It goes against all the cultural stereotypes, doesn’t it? For years, women were the ones who were pictured as having the eternal headache in bed. Now, astonishingly, the male population wants it less and less and women are up in arms! Are men having headaches too?
It’s time for this to stop being a taboo topic and for it to get more attention. It’s a real problem which is disrupting normal marriages and harming the life of countless people. It’s time that an answer is given to the following question: Why do men lose their sex drive?
According to marriage therapists, reasons are many – and some of them are contrary to what you may expect!
The normal reasons are all there – loss of libido due to the effects of aging and the natural slump in sex drive that results from a number of medical conditions, like high blood pressure, diabetes or heart problems. You may also add accidents and injuries, but this is still to be expected. What is new or less expected?
According to a number of studies, high stress levels that men are expected to absorb are a major factor in them experiencing a loss of sex drive. All at once, there is a sudden increase in pressure at the office or at home. At one time, men were expected to bring home the daily bread. Now, they are expected to excel in high pressure jobs, bring home big fat bonuses, be fantastic dads, become model husbands and dream lovers. All this together is something that many men find impossible to live up to.
Another major factor is the changing equation in gender roles and the effect it is having on the psyche of men and women. These days, more and more women are super achievers in their chosen field. They are achieving the feats that once belonged only to men, besides working hard at home, taking care of the kids and doing the laundry. Naturally, women tend to get critical of men, because hey, now women are doing all that men once did and more. This criticism seems to be turning it sour for men. Many men withhold sex because they consciously or unconsciously use it as a tool to punish the “dragon”.
According to marriage counselors and sex therapists, it is important for women to appreciate their men more. Men, on the other hand, need to go the extra mile to keep their women happy even on those nights when they don’t feel like it. This is supposed to be done with love, not just as a strategy.
Ultimately, there is only one advice for men and women who are frustrated with the lack of intimacy in their marriage: just do it! Once there is a perfect match in sexual expectations and fulfillment, all related issues will be solved automatically.
