Finding yourself in a sexless relationship isn’t something you just discover one bright day. Often, just realizing that your relationship isn’t just going through a temporary phase but a full-blown freeze-out takes time as it’s a difficult thing to admit, even to yourself.
However, if you want to fix your sexless relationship, you must face facts and be ready to fight for your relationship, knowing that this might take time and that you may face rejection along the way. If you keep your head buried in the sand, you will never find the strength to take action.
And take action you must because the very worst kind of advice a person in a sexless relationship or marriage can get is to do nothing, hoping this will go away. It won’t change unless you deal with it and work through it. If you’re looking for some form of help for your sexless relationship, you need to first look within you. It’s in your power.
Identify a possible trigger
The first step you need to take is to consider possible triggers. Often, people lose their passion for their partners due to some fight or resentment. You’d be surprised how resentment can fester and grow for a long time. It’s possible that due to some form of disagreement (something you though was long solved), that your partner is in some form punishing you. He or she may still love you, but they are punishing you, often without even knowing it.
If you do find a trigger, now is the time to clear the water between the two of you. It might be enough to bring back the passion. However, there is not always an apparent trigger. Dig deep, but don’t lose heart if you don’t find an obvious reason.
The cursed routine
Routine is one of the biggest enemies of passion. Routine is often boring, repetive by nature, and far from exciting. Couples often full into a routine – the wrong kind of a routine and this kills the passion between them.
To make sure this doesn’t happen to you, make it a habit to try out new things together (and I’m not just talking about the bedroom). Try out new activities like hiking, trekking, dancing, eating out at different places. The key is to get back to a dating mode. To bring back the excitement of dating. And it can be done regardless of how long you two have been seeing each other.
Communication
Naturally, communication is the key of any good relationship. You need to be open with one another. You can talk about the sexless state of your relationship, but don’t cast blame. This will never help. Make sure to express your love and promise to work through the problems you have. If your partner loves you, he or she will make the effort.
Final Note
I don’t recommend marriage for people in sexless relationships. There is nothing magical about marriage which will help. Work through your problems first and only then move forward in your relationship.
